If you’re new to the dating pool, or recently single, you’re probably nervous. It’s not easy to jump back on the horse after you’ve fallen off, or to get on one for the first time. Your hesitation is completely normal. But, you don’t want to be alone forever. You don’t want to miss out on a great opportunity for yourself either. So that’s why it’s important to get in the game. Your first step is just taking a breath. Next, it’s all about making a plan for yourself.
There are three important to things to know about before you get in the game.
The first and most important one is this: What are you looking for? It’s the first question you should ask yourself. Are you looking for a casual dating experience? Are you looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right? Are you just looking for friendship? It’s important to know this first, because you’ll want to express your head space to your prospective dates. You want to be honest with them right away. Don’t pretend you’re interested in something casual if what you’re actually looking for is a long term commitment. It’s also good to identify who you’re looking for. Go into your dating experience with the knowledge of what characteristics appeal to you. This helps you when it comes to compatibility with others. If you’re vague about your intentions or expectations, you’re not going to have a very positive experience.
The next thing you want to know is that honesty is important. You’re trying to make a connection with someone. Whether your intent is casual or long term, you aren’t going to make a connection through dishonesty. So tell your prospective dates about who you really are. Let them know about your amputation. It doesn’t define you as a person and you shouldn’t let it. It might not be an easy subject to approach, but it’s an important one. You want to find someone who is going to accept you the way that you are. So be open, be bold. Let people know up front. It may change a persons opinion about you, but that is their issue. If it changes their mind, don’t take it personally. You’re a great person, regardless of your amputation. Find someone who agrees.
Finally, use a little common sense during your dating experience. There are going to be people who want to ask questions. Human beings are very curious by nature. They aren’t trying to be rude or inconsiderate. If you’re uncomfortable talking about anything, let them know. The ones who keep pushing are the ones who are being rude. Most people will understand if you tell them you’re uncomfortable. But, they won’t know until you tell them the way that you feel. So make sure to communicate properly if you want to have a fun experience. That being said, don’t settle for someone who is rude. If you feel like someone is disregarding your feelings, leave. Everyone deserves to be respected.
Remember that dating is hard for everyone, not just those with an amputation. While you may feel nervous and awkward, it’s likely your date will too. Try to be understanding of their situation as much as they are of yours. It’s helpful to have a good sense of humor. It makes dating much easier.